Over the hump, and out of my slump

Last week was NOT a good week for me.

 

I felt like I was walking around with a cloud hanging over my head.  Everything and everyone was the enemy- and in my mind, out to get me and intentionally hurt my feelings.

Which was obviously not the case.  I sure did hate feeling that way though. 

I'm lucky though- a good friend reminded me that I'm allowed to feel that way.  So I just kinda embraced the way I was feeling- and realized that eventually, this too shall pass.

It turned out all I needed was a road trip, and a break from my every day routine. 

*~Insert trip to fabulous Camp Lejeune, North Carolina here.~*

I love driving.  Especially during a deployment.  I don't know what it is- maybe it's being able to have control of something while everything else is out of my hands, and most of the time, spinning completely out of control.  It's the ability to control how fast, how slow, the destination, the radio... all of it.  When Randy was deployed in 2007, I would just get in my car and drive.  One time I drove all the way out to Fort Macon and back- just so I could clear my head.  So when I got in the car on Friday afternoon, I instantly felt better.  I knew I had a solid four hours of nothing but driving- and blasting my eardrums out with my loud angry deployment music. 

I had had this trip planned for a while- since our FRO announced that the "Over the Hump" Beach party would be June 18th.  I figured it was a good excuse to head down to NC and spend some time with Leah and Landon, whom I hadn't seen since the day after Randy deployed.  It just so happened that it worked out at a time that I really needed a break.

As soon as I stepped foot on the beach, I immediately felt such a sense of relief, calm, and peace.  My thoughts were drowned out by the wind, the ocean, and a very excited 2 year old who just loves the ocean.  Having a few hours to worry about nothing else but sitting in the sand and getting some sun was definitely what I needed.  I needed to just not think- and it didn't hurt to have one of my closest friends at my side too!

So the moral of this story is- yes, we are allowed to have bad days, deployment or not.  But the important thing to remember is that the bad days go away and the bad feelings will go back into hiding.  Something will remind you that yes, you CAN do this, and you WILL get through this.... whatever "this" is. 

All I needed to do is take a step back, relax, and everything else fell back into place.  I no longer feel like the world is against me- and I am back to my stubborn, kicking this deployment's butt, old self!