Should we stay or should we go?

It's about that time again.


It's time for Randy to decide whether to re-enlist for 4 more years, or to get out of the Marine Corps altogether.  I'm very lucky that Randy includes me in this decision, and values my input and my opinion.

Reenlistment in Iraq- October 2006

Here's the problem though.... I LIKE the Marine Corps.  I'm not completely sure why.  But I do.   Apparently, as I was informed this weekend, this makes my husband's decision a LOT harder.  


I've been lucky in the time that I've been around to have very positive experiences.  Soon after I graduated college, I decided to move to Jacksonville with Randy.  6 weeks after I got down there, he left for his second deployment.  As a girlfriend in the eyes of the Marine Corps, I was pretty much a nobody.  But, to my husband's unit, I was someone who loved and supported and cared for someone who was deployed.  I was given practically all the same information that the wives were given, and I was allowed to participate in all the activities as if I were a spouse.  By the time the 3rd deployment rolled around, I was a Key Volunteer actively involved in our battalion. 

Michelle and Me- Valentine's Day scrapbooking- January 2007

See, in our first unit, it wasn't a matter of IF you would help out.  It was a matter of WHEN and WHAT you were planning on doing to help.  It was a matter of helping out, and getting help when you needed it.  Our battalion turned into a great big second family, which immediately sucked me in.  I learned very quickly that if someone needed something, you stepped up, and somehow someway that help would be returned if you needed it. 


I'm still amazed by the network of friends we have to turn to- people we haven't seen or talked to in 3 or 4 years are always a phone call away.  


Sure, the Marine Corps has thrown us some curve balls, and it hasn't always been the easiest ride, but what in life isn't challenging?  Doesn't that make the good times more worthwhile? My husband is doing something he loves, and that I love too.  It's rewarding for both of us.  How many people can say that?

But then we look at the flip side.  The Civilian Life.

Oh, to be "normal".  

To have a husband that doesn't leave for seven months at a time once a year.  A husband who doesn't bring in more dirt with him than anything else.  A husband who can actually STOP at a grocery store on his way home from work and pick up a gallon of milk.  A husband who doesn't respond to things with "Roger".  A normal 9-5 job.  To be able to say to someone in the military- "I don't know how you do it." To be able to buy a house and live in a place for more than 4 years.  Normalcy sure does sound appealing after the last 8 years.  But then again, it also sounds kinda, well, boring. 


So, as we venture into our next deployment, we will also be trying to figure out what step is best for us, and for the future.  That's the only sucky part- only once every four years do we get a chance to make this decision- and its hard to look that far in the future, while worrying about so many other things at the same time.  But we'll figure it out.  We always have.  And I'm pretty sure as much as Randy wants to fight the fact that he's a "lifer", we will be staying on this wild ride called the Marine Corps.


Which is more than ok with me. 

And furbabies make 5!

I should be cleaning right now, but I think I'm starting to become addicted to this blogging thing.  We'll see how long this lasts!

Everything in the Marine Corps seems to happen a little bit faster than things in the "real world".  I'm not quite sure why that is- maybe its the deployment cycle, who knows.  But Randy and I are definitely in the minority in that we don't have any kids yet.  And don't really want kids for a while.  I'm just too stubborn and selfish at the moment, and it pains me some mornings to have to get up to let the dog out, let alone care for another human being.  And for those that know Randy- well, that should be explanation enough right there... ha!

So, 2 days after our wedding back in 2007, we decided to adopt.  Furbabies that is.  We are both animal lovers- in fact, if given the opportunity, we would probably have a "dalmatian plantation"!  Off to the SPCA we went, on the great search for the perfect cats for us.  We went to the shelter thinking we just wanted one cat.  Somehow we wound up with 2.  Funny how that works.    

 

 

 

 

My firstborn, Damon.  October 2007

The middle child- Johnny. November 2007

Now, we chose Damon first.  He was sweet, cuddly, and fluffy.  Once we had chosen him, one of the volunteers said... "You know, he has a brother...." Well, crap.  They brought Johnny out, and explained to us that when he had been neutered, he had a bad reaction to the anesthesia, and was well... slightly off.  He was kinda wobbly, and had a runny nose.  They weren't sure if it was permanent, or if he would outgrow it. (Since then, he's grown out of it all- except he still walks funny.)  But they handed him to me, and he nuzzled right into my neck and started purring... and well, it was a done deal.  

And then there were two.

So we were a happy little family of four- Randy, me, Johnny and Damon.  (We are huge Yankees fans, and thats where the boys got their names.  Since then, Johnny Damon has left the Yankees, and we've learned to only name pets after retired Yankees players!)

A few months later, Randy was helping our neighbors next door move into a townhouse down the street.  When they got to the house, the people that were moving out had abandoned their puppy.  This dog had been locked in her crate with NO food and NO water for at least 3 days.  Ugh.  People make me sick.  

So the sucker that my husband is, called me and said.... there's this dog and I love her and I think we should keep her. NO NO NO!  That was not my PLAN. (There's that planning thing again.)  My plan was to get a puppy that summer, since I would be off from school, and be able to train her and housebreak her and all that fun nonsense.  

Turns out some of the best laid plans are meant to be broken.  After many, many, MANY discussions- and the fact that the only place we could find to take her was just going to euthanize her because she was potentially part pit bull- we decided to keep Mocha.  

Her first picture with us- about 4 months old and 27 lbs- March 2008

Her face just kills me-how could someone actually abandon a face like that?!  She was malnourished- nothing but skin and bones, and after months of misdiagnosed urinary tract infections, she had Lyme disease too.  I'm not positive, but I also think that the woman in the house she was living in just beat the heck out of her- because it took poor Mocha forever to come near me.  She still flinches sometimes when I go to pet her, because she thinks I might hit her.  :(

My only stipulation was that we would take her to obedience school.  I grew up with big dogs, and I REFUSED to have a big dog that would not listen to me, especially with Randy being gone so much.   So off to Petsmart we went, and after 16 weeks of classes, we had a graduate on our hands.  

So, us, plus 3 furbabies make 5.  Some days I feel like I live in the zoo.  But on the days when Johnny and Mocha are cuddled up on the couch with me, and Damon is on his ottoman, I wouldn't have it any other way.  These 3 are my kids, and I think during the deployment, they might be the only things that keep me sane.  And, on some mornings, the only reason I drag my sorry butt out of bed!

Everything's better when you're cruising!

For as long as I can remember, my family and I have ALWAYS gone on a summer vacation. 

I'm a lucky, lucky girl to be able to say that.  We went to Myrtle Beach, Boston, Washington DC, Florida.... turns out, many of those trips were planned around our curriculum at school.  I guess that's what happens when your mom is a teacher... you are tricked into learning. (Again, I'm not complaining!)

Last summer, we went to visit Mickey.  Let me tell you, I'm pretty sure I had more fun there as an adult than I ever did when I was a kid.

Here we are with Mickey!

                                                                  


So last year, while we were still on our Disney family vacation, we decided that we absolutely HAD to go on a cruise together next year- just the six of us.  My parents, my sister Liz, her boyfriend Brian, Randy, and myself.  My parents had cruised 2 other times before, and my sister and I had always been incredibly jealous.  So, a Carnival cruise it was!!  

Now we Sedlaks are some planners. Or control freaks, either one.  I think planners sounds better though.  ;)

Practically as soon as we got home from Disney, we began our research.  (This mostly involves my dad doing the legwork, and the rest of us approving his plans.  He pretty much rocks.)  Every time the six of us were together, ALL we talked about was cruising.  I'm pretty sure we were unbearable to be around- I apologize to those who had to hear about our cruise far too much.....

On August 7th, our cruising adventure began.  We made stops in Half Moon Cay, St. Thomas, Puerto Rico, and my all time favorite, Grand Turk.

Does it get any better than this?

  Nope, it really doesn't.  My dad found out about this amazing little bar called Jack's Shack.  There was food, drinks, chairs, music, and the bluest water I have ever seen in my life.  And to spend an afternoon on the beach with truly the most important people in my life was just priceless.

(And to do a shot of rum on the beach with your parents-also priceless!)

If you've never been cruising, I highly recommend it.  There's just nothing else like it.  We rode Segways, we had our own private beach cabana, we had the craziest, most out of control tour of St. Thomas- and that was just in port!  We played Bingo, went clubbing, listened to comedians, danced through the dining room at dinnertime, and I read a book surrounded by nothing but ocean.  We were so excited about our cruise that we actually put our deposit down for the next one while we were still on ship. 

Which brings me to my next, most important point.  

Exactly ONE year from tomorrow, we will be cruising again, and I just cannot wait! 

This time, it will be a post-deployment celebration cruise.  My family will all be there, as well as our closest friends.  I just can't wait to share this amazing experience with everyone.  Grand Turk won't know what hit them! ;)

And so the countdown begins- 366 days until we are cruising on the Carnival Miracle!

Deployment, OPSEC, and my PSA

In case you missed my version of a PSA....

I'll start this by saying I am not writing this in order to piss off, offend or upset anyone.  I'm mostly doing this to avoid stupid questions, preserve my sanity as long as possible, and probably most importantly, protect my husband (and his unit's) safety while deployed. 

 So let's start with that- OPSEC.  Sounds big and scary right? It stands for Operational Security.  In its simplest form, it means there really isn't a whole lot I can say about where, when and what Randy is doing, and how he's getting there. I'm going to try my hardest to follow OPSEC- but it gets pretty tricky.  So if you have a question you want to ask me, send it to me in a message. I'm going to try not to post anything in a public forum.  I've heard too many stories of suspicious characters piecing together what they read on people's Facebook walls, and using that to try to jeopardize our troops' safety.  So once he leaves, things will get very general.  I'm not holding out on you, I promise.  I'm just doing what I need to do to protect my husband and my friends. On the same note, if I do share information with you, please please PLEASE be careful with who you share it with, and be careful not to post any sort of specifics in a public forum.

 I think the next part- stupid questions/preserving my sanity can pretty much be lumped together.  Unfortunately- or fortunately- I haven't really decided yet- this is our 4th deployment.  FOURTH.  I can barely wrap my brain around that number.  So by the time this is all said and done, Randy and I would have spent approximately 28 months, or 840 days apart.  And that's just the actual deployment.  That's not including stupid training exercises, month long trips to the desert- and in our case this time around, voluntary separation. During that time, I'm positive I've been asked every question you should NEVER ask a military wife.  You name it, I've been asked. 

     So let me sum it up- yes I am afraid, sure I'm scared, of course I miss Randy every single day.  BUT, if I actually thought as much about all that as I probably could, I'd completely lose my mind.  As far as I'm concerned, when my husband is gone, I have no other choice but to wake up every morning and continue to live my life.  It's no fun for me- and for him- if I just completely shut down and stopped living my life.  Because then, what's the point of him doing his job?  If I curled up in a tiny little ball and just cried the way I want to, there's no reason for him to be fighting a war.  If I can't enjoy the very freedom my husband provides for me, none of this makes sense. 

    

So what can you expect from me?  There will be good days and bad days.  There will be days when I can't stop laughing, and days when I can't stop crying.  I'll experience an entire range and spectrum of emotions- some I'm pretty sure don't even have a name yet.  But I will do it all, and I will smile (or do my best to fake a smile) through it all.  Don't pity me, and certainly don't feel sorry for me.  Give me a high five, a handshake, a hug.  Be proud of me for supporting Randy as best as I can, and be proud to know someone who is serving their country so amazingly well. Send him an email, a message, a note in the mail- support from home makes it so much easier for the rest of us. 

 I knew what I was getting myself into long before I married Randy.  The one thing I have known about Randy is that he wanted to be a Marine.  He is the one person I know who has already accomplished everything he has ever wanted. I am so incredibly lucky to have him in my life, and I will do anything and everything it takes to make it through another deployment, so I can experience another homecoming.  At the end of the day, that's what makes all the good, bad, and worse days worth it. 

 

A title and the basics

Well, here I am.  

I am a blogger.  Not sure if I have anything all that interesting to say, but I guess we will find out.  I'll start this out the same way I did my facebook "PSA" the other night- My intention will never be to offend, piss off, or otherwise annoy anyone who reads it.  I'm betting though that my primary followers will be my friends, and you all know me well enough to know what I mean when I say something. (At least I hope.)


Anyway- the basics of me are this:  I am 28, married, a Marine wife.  I have parents who would still move heaven and earth if I needed them, and a sister who would be right behind them.  My husband has been in the Marine Corps for just shy of 8 years, I have been around in some way or another for that entire time.  We are about to begin our 4th combat deployment, and much to my dismay, they do NOT get any easier.  In fact, I'm fairly confident this will be the hardest deployment- at least emotionally.  So I think this blog will mostly turn into a way for me to vent over the next 8-9 months or so.  We shall see.  I'll try not to complain too much, because I really do love being a Marine wife and everything-good and bad-that goes along with it.

Coming up with a title was the hardest part of this whole "blog" process.  I HATE coming up with titles- which is slightly strange, since I have a degree in Journalism.  I just don't consider myself a witty enough person.  I'm much more straightforward.  So the title comes from one of my deployment CD's Randy made for me a few weeks ago.  When he was deployed in 2006, this song was on the radio a LOT.  All American Rejects- Move Along.  I listened to this song constantly, at top volume, and screamed along with the lyrics just to clear my head.  Every time I am feeling off, or out of control, I turn it on and really listen to the words:

Speak to me, when all you got to keep us strong
Move along, move along like I know you do
And even when your hope is gone
Move along, move along just to make it through move along 

To me, it makes everything else seem insignificant- because all you need to do is move along.  That's it... which sometimes is easier said than done. So, when all you've got to keep is strong, move along!