Oh well.
Month three has been completely uneventful and very unexciting.
That's probably why I felt like the month of May was never ending. On the flip side- I already feel like June is FLYING by. That is ok by me!
I spent a lot of time by myself- and I am ok with that. It gave me a lot of time to think- which again was ok. It led me to a major revelation- some of which I blame on my fantastic trip to California to visit some of our closest friends.
Coming back from California made me realize that I might not be as happy where I am as I could be at this moment in my life. It's hard to find happiness during deployment- and many years ago, right before we kicked off deployment number 3, I was reminded that you are miserable enough while they are deployed- so you need to make choices and do things that will make you as happy as you can be.
So- with that in mind- I am starting to make changes that will make me happy right now. I'm taking bigger risks- although "risky" for me right now is buying a loveseat from a website that's a final sale.... but for me, that's a pretty big risk. I'm speaking up for myself and saying no to more things. I'm getting stuck in a rut, and I just don't want to be. I'm choosing to do things that will make me happy now- hopefully these choices will ultimately make my family happy in the long term.
The next couple months will be a bit more challenging- in that we have some long stretches where I will not hear from the boy. Since I've talked to him every single day since he has left, this will be a bit of an adjustment for us both, but I will take a couple weeks of not hearing from him and knowing that he is safe versus what we have experienced in the past: months of fear with no communication during the height of fighting season in Iraq. I will certainly miss our daily chats, but we will be ok.
I'm excited for what the next few months will hold- and looking forward to making choices that will make ME happy.
Stay tuned!
